Remembering Client Names

Did you just meet someone at a conference who might be a potential client, but now a few minutes later you can't remember that individual's name? This happens to most of us each day. Unfortunately, the inability to recall names within the context of doing business can result in lost opportunities.

Remembering a person's name is an essential part of our professional daily business life. Yet, most of us have difficulty in recalling the name of a person we have just met. And, as we grow older, remembering names is just a bit more difficult.

The principal reason we tend to forget a name is that we don't give the individual enough attention. We are often distracted by our own thoughts on what to say or the impression we might be making.

One needs to establish a mental connection between the person and that individual's name. And, lets face it, personal names are just often harder to remember than most other types of information. They are abstractions and have little connection with familiar places or objects.

When we do remember a name it is usually through a context that has been established over time. Remembering the name of family members and close friends is a good example. We can even remember some people whom we have never met like George Bush, Madonna, Justin Timberlake, and Donald Duck. Why? Because each name is placed within a familiar contextual frame of reference which reinforces our remembering.

The name of an individual should be no more difficult to remember than any of type of other information. It is a matter of consciously trying to make a contextual connection between an individual and your own personal need to remember the stranger's name.

I was astonished one day as a student when a professor entered the classroom filled with over 100 students and asked each to state his/her name. He then went around the room addressing each person by name.

His method for recalling the name was very simple. He made an association between the name of the individual and something about that person such as the nature of their smile, style of hair cut, how their name rhymed with something familiar, or used a number of other memory techniques to help recall student names.

But the most important thing I learned that day was that the professor gave his full attention to the individual when that person first spoke. The professor wasn't thinking about how a stranger perceived him, or if his tie was on straight, or did he need to pick up bread on the way home. He focused on the individual, made an association of that individual's name with a context that would help him recall it later. Each person was regarded as special and received the professor's full attention.

Be engaged with the person. Give the person your full attention and become interested in the person as an individual. Forget about yourself, totally focus on this person you are meeting for the first time.
Confirm the individual's name by which the person likes to be addressed. Often a person will introduce someone else with a nickname, or a name other than that by which they like to be known. For example, my kid's name is Stephen and I have always used that when introducing him. But his preference is to be called Steve and he will often correct my introduction by saying, "Just call me Steve." So, when you meet someone who has been introduced as a Sal, Dick or Bob. Ask which they prefer Sal or Sally, Dick or Richard, or Bob or Robert.
Use the person's name often. Something I like to do as quickly as possible is to include a person's name in a sentence. For example, "Chris, is AJAX Media located in San Francisco or San Mateo?" Or, "I understand Chris, that you've been a producer for about ten years. Has all your work been in Seattle?" Using an individual's name a couple of times helps me remember it. Repetition is a key to remembering facts, figures, and names.
Associate the name with something familiar. Another memory technique is to relate a person's name with something familiar. If a person's name is Dale, for example, associate it with a river valley as in hill and Dale, or if the name is Betsy, perhaps associate it with the flag maker Betsy Ross.
Imagine writing the person's full name in your mind. When we do recall a person's name it is usually the person's first name that we most often remember. Common names such as Bill, Susie, Tim, Janet are familiar and easy to recall. But what about remembering a name such as Gregory Bronski? One recommended technique is to inquire about the correct spelling of the last name. Is it Bronskie, Bronsky, or Bronski. Once you have the correct spelling try imagining your writing it down on a piece of paper - or as one source suggests, "writing it across the person's forehead." This technique might include visualizing the name written in a favorite color or Magic Marker.
Be Selective when you say goodbye. If you are at a meeting and about to leave, think about who you want to recall from all those you have met. Say goodbye to those specific individuals and use their names when doing so. You can, if appropriate, offer to exchange business cards. These small exchanges are really helpful later one.
Put the name in print. When you get back to the office enter the names of individuals you want to remember in a notebook, or add to your computer's address folder. If you took pictures at the event be sure to add names to the pictures of those individuals you need to remember.

One of the things that I have learned is that unless you use a person's name you will forget it over time. When teaching, I was able to remember over thirty students names quite easily by the third week of class. I would had back papers individually and associate name and the topics about which they wrote. However, except for a few individuals who I continued to see around the campus, I would soon forget their names. Having taught over three thousand students in my career I know only a few by name outside the context of the classroom. Faces remain familiar as they are visual stimuli which tend to be better recalled than names alone. Making the connection between name and face is a difficult task to master, but in the long run seeing and knowing is much better than asking, "What's your name again, please."